Not Me! Monday

A few weeks ago we DID NOT find a dead squirrel in our backyard. This week, our second son DID NOT find a dead rat in the back. The conversation DID NOT go this way:
Him: MOM, I found a dead rat in the backyard, [hands in the air] but I didn't touch it.
Me: EW! What!? Where?
Him: Over on the hill. But it's already in the trash.
Me: But you said you didn't touch it.
Him: But, Mom, I didn't touch it. I just scooped it up with SJ's butterfly net and threw it in the trash.

I DID NOT shudder when I got said butterfly net and saw rat blood on it. UG UG UG!
{Update: Jenn Russo DID NOT witness the crime scene clean up!!}


I DID NOT try to make dinner more exciting by calling Captain Chicken "Pirate Captain Chicken". We DID NOT make pirate eye patches to wear during dinner. We DID NOT run out of paper, so I of course DID NOT resort to an extremely long Aldi receipt. Nope, not me!

I DID NOT gag just a little when I went into the baby's room and could smell the rank lovie from the door. Of course not, it gets washed on a regular basis. I would NEVER forget how long it's been since it's been washed. Nope, not me!

SJ was NOT stretching from the couch to the coffee table saying, "Mom, look. It's my foot lay down connection! That's what I call it when I do this."

More funniness over at MckMama's Blog

Have a great week!