Funny responses

I've been chided recently for not blogging with enough frequency. So here are some tidbits from our crazy life recently.

At dinner a couple weeks ago, C's behavior cost him the privilege of eating with the family. (Don't you love how I phrased that?) There was great wailing and gnashing of teeth and I really can't overstate the wailing. He needs no hyperbole. After some time to calm down and the rest of us finished eating, we were ready to talk to C about his behavior. And true to being a foolish child, he was focused on his hunger and not the problem of his behavior.

Me: Why did you lose the privilege of eating with the family?
C: I can't answer because I'm soooo hungry! At breakfast I'm gonna eat everything even yours!
I'm SO going to overeat at breakfast.
(That'll teach me! He'll eat my food!)


In the car:
C: Mom, is the Grinch part owl?
Me: Why do you think the Grinch is part owl?
C: Well, his fur looks kinda feathery, but mostly because he can turn his head in almost a complete circle just like an owl.

We are memorizing Psalm 19 as family, so we read through it every night before bed. C is FAR ahead of the rest of us and tonight he wanted to see how far he could go. So he gets one of the last verse actually says, "then I will be blameless and I shall be acquitted of great transgression." C says, "Then I will be blameless and I shall be committed for great transgression." All I could see is him in a straight jacket, "committed for great transgression!"


At the YMCA, there are times when the kids get to play in the racket ball court, which is one of SJ's favorite places to play. Driving in the car past the Rocket Park in Maplewood, SJ says,
"Mom, it's just like the rocket court! Will I get to play in the rocket court today at the Y?"

Not me! Monday

The freedom of not being perfect, not living up to every expectation, and confessing it to others. Ah...must be Not Me! Monday! More imperfect fun at MckMama's site.

I would never, I mean never stay up until 12:15AM on Sunday night, hoping MckMama would post her Not Me Monday at 12:01 like she did the previous week. Because I am NOT at all competitive, I DID NOT get annoyed when she hadn't posted it before I had to leave for carpool. I was not at all miffed that I was 92 when I was prepared at 12 AM. I would never put that much stock into a list. Ever.

I DID NOT leave the room where my 6 year old was giving a monologue about something inane. I DID NOT enter my bedroom, close the door, and say "Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up. You do not have to use all 10,000 vocabulary words in one afternoon," and then go back to the other room where my child, still talking, had not noticed my absence.

I DID NOT decide to take a shortcut while putting away the entire alphabet and numbers cookie cutters by not using the step stool. I DID NOT toss the cookie cutters up into the cabinet, unaware the bag of 40 cookie cutters was still open. They DID NOT rain down on my head and into the sink full of draining dirty dishwater.

While preparing to leave and pick up Sabrina, I DID NOT put down her lunch box. So I then, of course, DID NOT spend 10 minutes searching my house for said lunch box. I DID NOT find the pink camo lunch box on the top bunk of my sons' beds. I DID NOT put it there because I got distracted by quickly remaking Stuart's bed.

After an afternoon double play date, I DID NOT go to the YMCA to work off some frustration. I DID NOT burn off 726 calories of frustration in 55 minutes on a cross trainer. I DID NOT decide that was too little time away from my darling children, so I of course had no reason to take the 25 minute hot shower after the cross trainer.

When I caught my boys not following directions to clean their room, I DID NOT simply laugh at them because they were so darned cute, they looked like a cartoon pair. I would never be that silly.

I would never laugh at my husband's job. I didn't laugh at all when Friday he called to say he was leaving on Sunday morning at 6AM to fly to DC for 4 days to sit in the back while a delegation of Vietnamese lobbied the US government for the definition of catfish. I would NEVER laugh that his company would send my husband, who works in marketing, on this assignment.

Have a great week, everyone!

Not me! Monday

This week has been crazy! Enjoy all the things that DID NOT happen this week. More Not me! fun at MckMama.

I DID NOT get very frustrated at Shutterfly and Target for making it confusing to pick up prints and order them. I DID NOT make Michael figure it out and then get re-frustrated the next day when I got an email from the help desk explaining you have to use the co-branded site blah, blah, blah! I DID NOT get even more annoyed that I paid twice as much for the Christmas Cards because I didn't use the co-branded site. I DID NOT think of boycotting Target until I remembered I hate WalMart.

I DID NOT eat so much of my own Christmas Candy that I had to go the YMCA an extra day this week. I DID NOT spend extra time on the cross trainer so I could finish watching Gilmore Girls and rationalize it by saying, "I don't have cable and this is good for me."

I DID NOT spend many nights/early mornings this week annoyed with my daughter for getting up in the middle of the night and going into her brothers' room. This has not been going on for three weeks. I DID NOT contemplate putting some Frangelico in her hot chocolate before bed. (We opted for the baby gate at the door instead)

I DID NOT watch Michel Buble sing on PBS and get totally distracted by the fact that his feet are really big, even though I've got a little crush on him.

I DID NOT get so unbelievably excited when I started using TweetDeck that I clapped. It has truly saved me from Twitter insanity!

I DID NOT find a load of towels in the washer that had been there about 5 days. I had NOT been wondering where those clothes were.

Not me! Monday

Oh, the best part about Mondays is here! Enjoy the reality of my life and the others on MckMama's site.

I DID NOT get really excited that I was number 42 last week on MckMama's Not Me!

I DID NOT start packing the first boxes for preparing the house for sale...in March. I DID NOT make a master packing list. I AM NOT scared at my own organization that it's difference from my natural personality.

I DID NOT eat the small serving of ice cream left in the carton, right from the carton. I DID NOT throw in some cashews and call it a "protein snack".

I DID NOT pick up bits of dried peas and Cheerios off the floor and put them in my jacket pocket because I didn't want to walk the 7 steps to the kitchen trash can. I DID NOT wear that jacket to the YMCA. I DID NOT find the same bits in my jacket the next day. I am NOT questioning whether or not they're still there.

After actually remembering the camera for the Junior Kindergarten Thanksgiving Feast, I DID NOT want to say bad words, when the batteries went dead after two pictures.

I DID NOT pour my last two tablespoons of coffee beans straight into my mug. After noticing that and putting them into the grinder, I DID NOT pour the ground coffee beans straight into my mug. After pouring the ground coffee into the french press, I DID NOT forget to rinse the mug before putting my half and half into it. I DID NOT still drink the coffee with floating grinds because I wasn't going to waste the half and half. I AM NOT that cheap.

I DID NOT get extremely excited to go to Dierberg's by myself on Sunday. I DID NOT wear my sticky name tag from church throughout the store. I DID NOT not notice this until I was home.

I DID NOT find my two year old daughter with a peri bottle in her mouth. (See previous post for the full story)