Hurry up and Wait.

I have multiple personalities. (Some of you are saying, "I knew it!")

One personality is completely at peace with the entire process of selling and buying a new house. I don't doubt in the least God's timing, His provision, or His care for us. I believe fully in His will working out in my life. I can be patient because I have trust in Him. I believe the Kingdom is more important than my house and that our shelter is in His hands.

The other personality just doesn't want to do it. We've been preparing to leave this place for 2 years. We've remodeled, repaired, maintained, painted, pruned, cleaned, thrown out, and staged. My heart has left this place as home. I don't want to wait any more. I don't want to go through it. I can look at new houses online, but not visit them. I can think about packing, but not open a box. I even forget that I'm pregnant sometimes because I have no where to put this child and all our baby things are in storage. I don't want the holding pattern of keeping the house ready to show at any moment. The four year old in me is "I don't wanna."

It's weird not to feel worried at all, but annoyed at the same time. I fully believe and know God is with us and guiding us through this process, but I just want it to be over. I want to learn what God has for me in this season, but I would rather it be over quickly.

I understand the reality is 90 days to sell in this market, but my hope & faith in God says He can do it in 9. And I would really like that. God will glorify Himself in this process and, really, that's the most important thing, to both personalities.

Not me! Monday

Ah, Monday! This week was full and I'm sure MckMama has even more!

I DID NOT spend 20 minutes refreshing MckMama's page waiting for Not Me! Monday last week. I DID NOT desperately need to pee during this time. I am NOT that obsessive about things. I DID NOT give up and then try again 10 minutes later to see it posted and I was number 39. I would never spend that long wasting time on anything.

While working on an auction project that DID NOT balloon into something far more than anticipated, I DID NOT feed my children Imo's pizza & assume I would make my own supper because I hate Imo's. I did not each about 8 slices of the pizza I did not order and think with each bite, "I hate this."


I DID NOT find my children outside looking like this. It was 25 degrees.
I always know where my children are and dress them appropriately for the temperature.


On a trip to the Target bathrooms, my daughter DID NOT somehow pee into her underwear, while on the toilet. I managed to save the tights, thinking we were good to continue our shopping. Somehow while I was using the toilet, the extra long tights got caught under my leg and into the toilet bowl (which yes we did not flush between the girl and me). When I pulled the tights out, I did not get a wide slash of pee water across my pants. My daughter DID NOT progress through Target out to the car without underwear to get new underclothes for her. After sorting her out in the car, I DID NOT continue through Target with my pee laced pants. I DID NOT get so distracted in the store, that I was late to pick up my other child from school. As someone on the Dave Ramsey plan, I of course had all the cash I needed in my purse to purchase my products, so I DID NOT use my Discovercard to pay for my items so I could race out the door with my pee pants and other children to make it carpool.

Have a great week!

House for Sale!

Forward this to anyone you may know who might be interested in buying an adorable house in Webster!!!!! (Click the envelope at the end of the post.)

Open House
Sunday, February 22, 2-4PM
Drop by and oo & ahh!


MLS# 90007997

www.817Atalanta.com

www.ryanshakofsky.com


Click the picture to see full size.

Not me! Monday

Oh, yes. Monday folks! It's the crazy, MckMama inspired, Not Me! Monday! So in case anyone reports the events below as true and factual, y'all know the truth: they are outright slander! I would never be involved in the following activities!

I DID NOT have to clean up poop from my daughter's carseat in a parking lot in Columbia. I DID NOT have to send her in the semi-clean car seat for another two hour stint in the car. The car seat DID NOT come back to me with the faint stench of poo. (EW!)

I DID NOT forget about the poopy mess in the plastic bag for 3 days. I, of course, rinsed it out immediately upon returning home. I DID NOT contemplate throwing out the underpants, but then realize they were my daughter's favorite bloomers, keep them.

I DID NOT ship my children off to the grandparents for the weekend so we could finish preparing the house to go on the market this week. I also DID NOT send them so I could work on a large auction project for their school. I DID NOT spend more than 18 hours working on that project. I am NOT still having issues with the technical side of the project.

I DO NOT feel like all I've been doing for the last 6 months is preparing this house to sell. I DID NOT realize that and then realize that it hasn't even listed yet!

I DID NOT wear a skirt that was snug when I wasn't pregnant with a bella band. It did not look like it was inappropriately short. I DID NOT just wear it all day because I didn't have time to change.

I DID NOT thoroughly enjoy an evening spent with 3 other ladies who enjoyed grammar humour. I AM NOT that big a nerd. We DID NOT fall into fits laughing about the objective case of the first person. No, I am NOT that girl. (Ok, it was late and we were punchy. Is that really a defense? Wait, why do I need a defense? I DIDN'T do that!)

There is NOT a case of chicken pox in my 4 year old's class. I am NOT at all worried about having to deal with chicken pox the week our house goes on the market and before my trip to Houston.

I DID NOT have morning sickness all day on Tuesday. I WAS NOT dizzy. I DID NOT drive feeling dizzy and sick. I DID NOT watch True Beauty after lying on the couch for 3 hours.

I AM NOT going to simply stop the madness of this week's not me's. There are too many more.

Happy Monday!

Stuart's funny-isms

Stuart is really fun right now. Four and half is great age for him. He's helpful, curious, funny, and so sweet.
These are some recent funny things he's said.

The other day, we were in the van, waiting at the top of the driveway for everyone to buckle so we could leave. I hear Stu from the backseat,
"I'm buckled. Let's move. Let's groove. Let's move, let's groove, let's move!"
in very distinct rhythm. [For the musicians out there. ti|ta rest ti |ta rest ti|ta ti ta ti |ta]
I had tears in my eyes it was so funny!

After a few days of being stuck in the house during all the snow a few weeks ago, we went to Sonic for their 99¢ junior sundaes. Stu chose Oreo. Once again, from the back I hear,
"Hey, wait a minute! When you eat the Oreo and you mix the Oreo with the ice cream...it's good!" Yeah, that one got written down on the napkin so I could remember his serendipitous discovery. I really thought he was about to shout, "Eureka! Someone should sell this!"

Some of his common phrases.
"Hey, wait a minute!"
"I need to tell you something." (Thank you, friend Owen.)
"Sure. Sure. Sure."
"You've got to be kidding me!"

Ask and you shall receive

I have felt myself being sucked into being consumed by this house. I've felt like I'm in a giant pool, being pulled by the water tornado toward the drain. I'm trying to keep my focus on God and the Kingdom, but I quickly turn my attention to the house again. Preparing our house, praying for a buyer, a quick sale, looking for a new house, wondering what will happen. It's almost like I'm watching myself fall into the trap. "Be careful, Jenn. You're starting to focus on yourself and not the Kingdom." I know God cares about every small and big thing in my life. We believe He's told us to move. I want a new house so I can fill it with people and use it for the Kingdom. I believe this house is His, as well as everything else; I am just a steward of the blessings God has given. Yet it's easy to focus on stewarding the blessings and not the One who gives them. So I've been praying, "God, help me seek the Kingdom first."

Amazing...God answers prayers like that!

Today reading Psalms 27-29, these thoughts and truths really blessed me and brought me peace.

27:4 One thing have I asked of the LORD,
that will I seek after:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
all the days of my life,
to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD
and to inquire in his temple.

That's really what I want, to dwell with God. To live my life with Him. In relationship with the most amazing being, Creator God. I want to dwell in His house, no matter where "my house" is and what it's like. I want to seek after Him, like a seek, pursue, and make time for a relationship with Michael. As long I'm with Him, why should I fear?

27:8 You have said, "Seek My face."
My heart says to You,
"Your face, LORD, do I seek."

It hit me tonight that seeking God's face isn't really just asking, "What should I do?" We say, "I need to seek God about that." But really, I will seek His face not to know what to do, but to know Him. I seek God to have intimacy with Him. That's what He wants. I do ask God for guidance and direction, of course. But mostly, worship and adoration, being in His presence, that's what I want.

Not me! Monday

Oh, yes! It's Not Me! Monday courtesy of MckMama and all the rest of us who celebrate Monday by sharing all the activities that we were NOT involved in this week. I of course did none of the following this week. Seriously.

I DID NOT take on too many responsibilities this past week. So much so, that my pregnant self only slept 5/6 hours a night.

I was NOT amazed by God's provision this past week in reliving me of some of those responsibilities after I committed.

I DID NOT go to a church small group meeting in full Lancome Spring make-up, Pink Irreverence after a full day of training. I DID NOT look like a clown because I didn't get to choose the colors and the bright pink lipstick didn't go as well with my "I've been up since 5:30AM skin" as one might have liked. (the new look is cool, but not so much for a small group meeting!)

I DID NOT bribe my children with a treat for behaving well in Lowe's. My children always follow directions with no need of candy/chocolate to entice them into obedience.

I DID NOT sit in the silence of my house after we had pictures taken for selling the house. I was NOT amazed at the grace of God in this place and at the same time I am NOT so ready to go, I would leave tonight if I could.

I DID NOT lock our bedroom door and stay in bed until 9AM on Saturday because we were so tired!

This past week has not been so busy, I have NOT forgotten all things I thought of for this post.



On a serious note, this week a sweet, little, 8-year-old boy name Grant has gone to be with Jesus. His family is grieving, but their walk through this is amazing. Please pray for his parents and his older brother & sister. They have only started the grieving process.

Fear

I've been thinking a lot about fear recently. Fear in my life usually comes in the form of "what if?"
"What if something is wrong with the baby?"
"What if something happens to Michael or the other children?"
"What if our house doesn't sell?"
"What if we can't afford a new house?"

All these questions are rooted in fear. Not that we can't ask or don't ask questions, but I have the tendency to spin out scenarios based on the questions. Then my focus becomes on me and the solutions and options, rather than God. It's so easy; I slip into it before I even realize it. And then hope dissipates and escapes me.

Yesterday, a dear old friend experienced a tragedy in her life that was expected, but still so difficult. Her 8 year old son died after fighting for so long. How Emily, Shawn, and their son Grant have handled this suffering has reminded me where my hope is found. Nothing on this earth compares to knowing Jesus. Really, nothing.

In Christ alone my hope is found;
He is my light, my strength, my song;
This cornerstone, this solid ground,
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, what depths of peace,
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease!
My comforter, my all in all—
Here in the love of Christ I stand.

In Christ alone, Who took on flesh,
Fullness of God in helpless babe!
This gift of love and righteousness,
Scorned by the ones He came to save.
Till on that cross as Jesus died,
The wrath of God was satisfied;
For ev'ry sin on Him was laid—
Here in the death of Christ I live.

There in the ground His body lay,
Light of the world by darkness slain;
Then bursting forth in glorious day,
Up from the grave He rose again!
And as He stands in victory,
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me;
For I am His and He is mine—
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.

No guilt in life, no fear in death—
This is the pow'r of Christ in me;
From life's first cry to final breath,
Jesus commands my destiny.
No pow'r of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home—
Here in the pow'r of Christ I'll stand.
(Stuart Townsend)

As they grieve for Grant, they and I remember that he is singing with His Savior in heaven, and that one day He will wipe away every tear.

So when the questions, the 'what ifs' come, I will remember that nothing can ever take me from my life in Christ. That is where my hope is found.

Not me! Monday

Oh, this week was full of so many things I DID NOT do, I don't even think MckMama's followers could keep up. I'll only include a few items here.


I was not incredibly giddy when my husband got home. Then, I did not sleep for 16 hours when my husband finally returned from being on a business trip for 6 days.

I did not think about throwing a fit on the second snow day this week. I did cry instead.

I did not spend way too much time on Facebook this week, reading many people's "25 Random things."

I did not allow my daughter to dance in her underwear to 7 Brides for 7 Brothers. I of course did not video it and post it here.





I did not stay up an extra 10 minutes just to wait for MckMama to post Not Me Monday. And I was not thrilled to be number 6! I'm not that competitive against, well, nothing really!